Personal development

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Learning How to Lead
Learning How to Lead 768 1024 Julia Warner

The non-trivial machine: part 2

I was recently having a conversation with a colleague about a leadership program he was designing. He asked me what I thought would be a useful concept to include in a program for managers who were learning how to lead people. And what has come to mind is the concept of the non-trivial machine.

In a previous blog article, I talked about how the concept of the non-trivial machine impacted my approach to teaching. Here I would like to elaborate on how this concept can impact a manager’s approach to managing their people.

As I wrote in the article “Coaching Taught Me Leadership”, human beings are an example of so called non-trivial machines. That means we cannot expect or predict with total accuracy how a person is going to respond to certain “input”. People are complex psychological and emotional systems, and what might work for one, may not work at all for another. One and the same input can trigger a range of different outputs in different people. This is especially the case when working with a diverse workforce.

Simply giving instructions (or orders) is not enough.

Choosing to follow

Indeed, that is what leaders are facing when they manage people. Getting your team to perform productively is a lot more complex than simply giving instructions (or orders).

So, based on the premise that non-trivial machines can choose their output, then we can assume that when human beings follow a leader, it is because they have chosen to do so. They have made the decision that it is in their best interests. 

So how do you get people to choose to follow you? 

Understanding

Learning to lead is about understanding what drives and inspires people to do the things they do. That could be a desire for security, connection, respect, and/or growth, for example. Hence, leaders should not only to be experts in their field, but also have a good understanding of human nature. And understanding your own motives and needs lays a good foundation for that.

That explains the necessity of leadership development programs that require leaders to do a bit of soul searching and self-reflection. And the concept of the non-trivial machine can make that more logical and palatable to the more “rationally” driven.  

Keep growing <3 <3 <3 

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Getting What You Want
Getting What You Want 738 1024 Julia Warner

What do you want?

One of the most valuable skills anyone can cultivate in life is to be clear about what they want. Then it helps to have the courage to go out and get it. This may seem kind of self-evident, but it actually requires a bit more self-knowledge, i.e., personal development, than some might think. Additionally, it requires thorough preparation. And from my own experience as well as my experience teaching negotiation skills, this is what people most often underestimate. Yet it can make all the difference.

My conviction is that in order to negotiate well, you need to be authentic. That means you need to know what you want, and I mean what you really want. Advertising bombards us with ideas of what we should want, we can’t hear our own true voice amidst the cacophony of capitalism.

And then of course as social beings, we adopt the values of our environment without even being aware of it. We grow up with beliefs that are so embedded into our subconscious that we take them for truths. We may never put them in question even though they influence our decision-making on a daily basis. Do you want what you want because you really want it, or because you were taught to want it? How can you tell the difference?

Satisfaction is a helpful form of measurement.

Satisfaction

Over the years, I have found a helpful form of measurement for myself. It is not only a feeling of satisfaction, but also the duration of that feeling. Of course, what gives you satisfaction is totally subjective. But you will probably feel pretty satisfied right after you reach your goal. But how long does that feeling last? If you notice yourself feeling flat or disinterested about your achievement rather soon, it’s possible that it was based on extrinsic motivation. In other words, you were motivated by external factors to pursue that goal.

External factors could be approval from your peers, praise from your parents, acknowledgement from your boss or employer, attention from a romantic partner etc. All these things have their place; we do not live in a vacuum. And sometimes they gives us a needed KITA: “kick in the ass” to quote Frederick Hertzberg. Nevertheless, sustainable satisfaction and long-term contentment tends to come from intrinsically motivated accomplishments.

Preparation

Preparation is key to improving your negotiation skills and understanding what drives you intrinsically. Let me give you an example from my life that is perhaps a bit paradox. I recently bought myself a panel van and leisure activity vehicle. The reason why I write that this example is a bit paradox is because a car is often considered a status symbol. And status symbols are usually about external validation.

But I did not buy that car on a whim. Visions of road trips and being close to the great outdoors have always filled my vacation fantasies. And I did a lot of research and preparation in terms of what I wanted, what I needed, and what I could afford. Looking at different models that were available and comparing price with performance was my favorite pastime for a while. So I had the more technical or “rational” aspects covered.

But what was more decisive was looking closely at my motives for wanting to buy that car. I did not want to wake up two weeks after my purchase and regret my decision. Why did I want it, really?

Well, I very much enjoy camping. But what’s more is how that car symbolizes my most prominent values: autonomy, flexibility, adventure, and at the same time safety and comfort. And this is where self-knowledge plays a really important role. Sure a fancy hotel is nice for a weekend, but for a proper vacation, I want to explore the great outdoors.

Every time I get in that car, I feel a spark of joy combined with pride. And a lot of that pride is because I got what I wanted for a really great price. The research and patience paid off. It’s been 6 months, and I don’t regret it yet.

Authenticity

Sometimes it’s scary to admit to yourself what you want. Especially if it goes against the expectations of your environment or against the image other people may have of you. And so we return to authenticity. Developing the courage and the skill to not only know what you want, but to be what you want, will greatly improve your negotiation skills and increase the quality of your life. I really recommend it.

Keep growing <3 <3 <3 

Career Path
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My Career Path
My Career Path 768 1024 Julia Warner

Far from linear

My career path has been far from linear. Coming from a family of artistic people, I was always encouraged to do something creative and to follow my dreams. And for lack of any other ideas, I went on to study singing after graduating from high school, and so got my first degree in performing arts. My dream was to be a songwriter.

However, my dream did not include an “earning a living” part. That was totally not in my field of vision. I had no clue how to make proper money as a songwriter. Gigging around town with my jazz quartet brought in a little cash, but it was not a sustainable solution.

So I was very lucky to have discovered the opportunity to teach English as a foreign language to business professionals in Vienna. What a leap, right? I could work as a freelancer, I was quite good at it, and I really enjoyed it. And the meaning I attached to it was that it enabled me to continue creating music while supporting myself.

After a while though, the teaching grew and the songwriting shrank. I had become tired of feeling divided and not being able to focus on one thing properly. So, I decided to make the mature move and to take my teaching more seriously. It seemed the universe was nudging me towards teaching anyway.

I realized soon enough, however, that teaching English as my main professional focus quickly became hollow. The whole purpose of teaching English was to enable my creative endeavors. Without those, my motivation plummeted.

What could I do that combined the creative flow that songwriting gave me with the talent I discovered as a teacher? Well, I did what so many people do in mid-life who find themselves at a crossroads: I trained to become a coach.

It does sound a bit cliché, I know. Nevertheless, it did give me hope and a new direction. It was something different that I was able to get very excited about. My motivation was back. And I was going to need it!

Because that was 10 years ago.

It took some time to carve out my niche. And in this field, it is always a work in progress. Yet, so long as it feels meaningful, and I can keep growing, then I am on the right, albeit sometimes bumpy, path.

And of course making money is important, but it is not the essence of my motivation. The meaning that coaching and soft skills training gives me is the constant development that goes along with it. In other words, it is unendingly creative.

So what I discovered is that creative work doesn’t have to be “artistic”. If I had had a good coach at 19, I wonder how different my life would be. In any case, I am the coach now, and the good thing about my irregular career path is that my clients will benefit from my experience. So indeed it is all as it should be.

Keep Growing <3 <3 <3        

Non-trivial-machine
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Coaching Taught Me Leadership
Coaching Taught Me Leadership 768 1024 Julia Warner

A tricky task

I encountered the concept of the non-trivial machine (Heinz von Foerster) when I was training to become a coach at Train Consulting (www.trainconsulting.eu). Since the program focused on coaching and leadership, the participants were mostly managers developing their leadership skills by adopting coaching methods. And we all soon learned what a tricky task coaching is. Because you are not supposed to tell people what to do, it is a challenging way to lead.

Instead, a big part of a coach’s function is to strengthen an individual’s sense of agency and self-responsibility. When being coached, a person refines the ability to learn from experience. And this empowers them to take control of their development and produce their desired outcomes.

The coach accompanies the coachee on their learning journey. They support the process, provide an outer perspective, and set impulses. That way, the individual gets nudges that trigger new ways of looking at things. But a coach does not provide answers – and certainly not “the correct answer”.

As a teacher and trainer, this idea was hard for me to grasp in the beginning. Enter the idea of the non-trivial machine.

The non-trivial machine

First, it helps to look at what a trivial machine is to understand what a non-trivial machine is. A coffee vending machine is a trivial machine. I put in a coin, I press a button, and based on my selection, I get my chosen product. So, the input dictates the output in a predictable manner. A trivial machine should always produce the expected output. And if it doesn’t, the machine is broken.

A non-trivial machine is a machine where the output cannot be predicted from the input. The machine is autonomous. It chooses the output based on its current state or mood. Simultaneously, it factors in elements from the surrounding environment. This requires the ability to make judgements and think creatively. Human beings are non-trivial machines. That means you can never be 100% sure what output you’re going to get.

This concept really helped me shift my mindset. Working with people is not a linear process. Human beings are not predictable machines. Cause and effect are rarely transparent. Sometimes it takes different kinds of input to get the desired output, and these can vary from day to day. Hence, it is a continuous process of trial and error. And being able to navigate that uncertainty is what I call leadership.

As a coach or leader, I can set an impulse, such as asking thought provoking questions. Then in collaboration with the individual, we work with the output that emerges.

Traditional teaching is different

This is a different approach to teaching. Especially classical teaching methods, which go more into the direction of a trivial machine approach. For example, the teacher provides input, the learners reproduce it either correctly or incorrectly, i.e., a linear process. In this model, learning is imitation – which has its place depending on the context.

Yet, the assumption behind coaching is that the individual has the resources they need to find a good solution. They just aren’t aware of it yet. The coach supports the coachee in uncovering that. In this model, learning builds on existing knowledge, skills, and talents and is more individualized. This produces more original results.

Learning to become a coach has impacted the way I teach. Instead of feeling obligated to be the source of all knowledge, I want my students to learn that they can design solutions that suit them and their needs best. And the same goes for managers who want to lead their people.

Now I focus more on enabling the learning process – rather than controlling it. My aim is to foster motivation and self-responsibility.

Taking a coaching approach to teaching produces learning spaces that encourage experimentation, reflection, leadership, and innovation. And in this fashion we expand our most precious qualities of being human.

Keep Growing <3<3<3

Ladder of success
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Constructive Criticism
Constructive Criticism 1920 2560 Julia Warner

Reluctance to criticize

When I started teaching in 1997, I began as a business English trainer. My job was to go into companies and work with all kinds of staff at all levels on their English language skills. And one of the things I struggled with, especially in the beginning, was giving constructive criticism. It’s not that I didn’t notice the mistakes my clients were making. Certainly not. In fact, I had become highly sensitized to even the most minor of errors. I struggled because I did not want to undermine the motivation or confidence of my learners.

On a side note, what I am calling constructive criticism can also be referred to as feedback. What I mean here is the process of correcting someone who is learning and developing a new skill. This can happen in an educational environment, but also in a work environment where a person has taken on a new task.

One of the most rewarding parts of working in education for me is witnessing someone blossom as they learn a new skill. That is why I was wary of dampening anyone’s spirits by pointing out their mistakes too quickly.

Another significant reason why I grappled with criticism was that sometimes the recipients would begin justifying themselves or even argued with me. And that would make me feel just plain uncomfortable, embarrassed, or annoyed.

There must be a better way

There must be a better way, I thought. But I hadn’t really received any specific training on how to give constructive criticism. So, I spent quite a few years just kind of winging it. Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn’t. And usually I blamed the recipient if it didn’t.

But I knew deep down that blaming the recipient was avoiding my responsibility. It also really bothered me that even though it was an integral part of my job, this was something I didn’t like doing. It is integral to any kind of learning situation, whether in the classroom or at work. How else can you know what to improve if you don’t receive constructive criticism?

Then one lucky day, I learned about The Praise Sandwich from two wonderful teacher trainers from Oxford University that I had the good fortune to work with on a project for The British Council (Julie Dearden and Tom Spain from www.oxfordemi.co.uk).

That sandwich changed my life. My days of fearing criticism were over.

So without further ado, I would like to present to you the standard steps for making the sandwich, and then I will elaborate on how I like to use it:

Step 1: Pick out something specific that is working well and praise it.

Step 2: Pick out something specific that needs to change or be improved and give criticism.

Step 3: Give an overall encouraging remark.

How I like to use it

After using the sandwich for many years, I have fine-tuned it to work for me, and I would like to expand on that now.

Before step 1

I like to make sure the person is ready for the feedback before I begin. I do this by making eye-contact and sometimes even asking “Are you ready?”. If it is a less formal situation, for example during a break or in the office, I initiate the conversation by saying “Can I talk to you for a minute?” and then saying “I wanted to give you some feedback. Is that OK?”

Addition to step 1

As a way to lead into the first piece of praise, I like to describe what I have observed in a neutral manner. It is useful to focus on visible behavior, like something you could record with a video camera. I try to be as specific as possible.

The reason I do this is because when I share my observations, it seems to me that the recipient appreciates the recognition. And when I do this, I am acknowledging the person’s effort – not the result. And I am letting them know that I paid attention.

Then I pick out something specific that is working well. And I try to refer to an example. I believe that this can strengthen the receiver and put them in a resource-oriented mindset. That way they will be able to accept the critical part more constructively rather than defensively.

Addition to step 2

When I get to the critical part, it makes sense to point out the parts that obviously need to be improved. I have heard people recite a litany of errors when giving feedback. If you ask me, the recipient can’t remember criticism when it is presented as a long list. The idea is to help them understand and accept what the next steps towards improvement can be – not create an unsurmountable wall of frustration.

Additionally, the criticism should focus on something the person has control over and can actually change. I sometimes make suggestions for improvements if I can. And if the criticism is referring to something really important, I do not soften it. I state plainly and clearly: “It is really important that you work on this”. And I say it calmly, which I find is much more effective than getting too dramatic.

Addition to step 3

I like to finish with an overall encouraging remark that has a future focus. So, something like, “If you include more interactive elements, then your presentation will be livelier and more engaging next time.”

Opposition

Despite my enthusiasm, I am aware that this method also has its opposers. I have heard colleagues say it is too soft and indirect, or that it doesn’t actually improve performance. I think it depends on the context. In my opinion, in a learning context where people are stepping outside of their comfort zones and making themselves vulnerable, you need to respect and support that by making sure they save face. And I believe this method does that while at the same time pointing out where improvements can and need to be made.

Of course there are circumstances where other methods are more suitable, but they will not be discussed here today.

And in my experience, when used properly in the appropriate circumstances, the effect can be really positive. So, this method is useful where-ever you are responsible for the performance of someone else and/or where-ever you are expected to provide guidance, instruction, and motivational support.

In the end, the recipient decides what to do with the constructive criticism. You have offered your perspective, but they are the ones who have to put it into action, or not. The ball is in their court. Nevertheless, since I have started using this technique, I have been able to notice a far better response from clients, students, and even colleagues, leading to improved results and relationships.

Keep Growing! <3 <3 <3

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